Philipp, buddy, sorry!!!

I should point out that because I'm such a douche-bag and a moron I mistakenly wrote the wrong name in the COSA-NOSTRA ASIA post of the über-nice guy who sent me the COSA-NOSTRA ASIA video tape. It wasn't Kiba but Canisius (aka Philipp)!!!!!!! I probably mixed them up as they are both in Germany but obviously that's no excuse. I've corrected the post now. Now please excuse me while I go stick my head in the oven.

Hitting the hitman

A few people who read my blog do it on a regular basis and some come here via a link but I also get a lot of hits from people who are looking for something that's so completely out to fucken lunch that I'm just scratching my head going "Huh?" repeatedly, haha. Why they were diverted to my blog by Google I don't know. This is what people were looking for today and yesterday. Some of it I understand very well. Some, not so well (but actually they're pretty good, some other days I get heaps of hits from people looking for Danish, Danish porn, porn, and everything else in between that's related to porn and Danish, haha).


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I get at least one hit from someone looking for "One man one cup" every day. I've said it before and I'll say it again: I'm sure they get mighty disappointed when they find my video of a guy with an actual cup (that he doesn't shove up his arse). And I would recommend that the person looking for a download copy of TURKISH RAMBO went and bought it on DVD instead. Support the little indie video companies! DarkMaze who put it out aren't gonna put any more Turkish stuff out if they don't get their money back. And I'm sorry, I don't have any posts with Birte Tove with pussy. Haha.

Altho I don't usually mention it here Scandinavian readers might wanna keep in mind that I also have a blog here and I do update it from time to time.

COSA-NOSTRA ASIA (1973)

[Germany/VHS/German dub/no subs/letterbox]

Here's the German VHS cover for Bobby A. Suarez' entertaining Chris Mitchum film COSA-NOSTRA ASIA made in the Philippines in 1973. Canisius (aka Philipp) of Cinehound forum was so nice as to send it to me as a surprise gift (in order to get me to speed up sending him some stuff which... I was being slow doing. Yes, I'm a slow bastard, sorry to everyone who's still waiting for something!). Anyway, big thank-you's go out to Philipp!!! You're the best, mate!!! More people ought to send me rare films for free. LOL. And yes this is indeed a rare film! COSA-NOSTRA ASIA (aka Asia Cosa-Nostra) has never had an English language video or DVD release and exists only on video dubbed to funny languages such as German, French and Spanish. There are three different German video releases and the one Canisius sent me is a bit different to the one I'm posting here. There's white instead of blue and the pictures are arranged differently on the back of the cover. And it's a cool bigbox edition with the cover printed directly on the box. Very nice (and as I said a rare tape too). The German VHS is fully letterboxed and dubbed in German. I have no idea whether it's cut or not.

THE BLIND WARRIOR - hk vhs

[HK vhs/fullscreen/English dub/Chinese subs]

I wrote a piece on the wild Indonesian THE WARRIOR (aka Jaka Sembung) series here and I just wanted to show you an awesome cover for the Hong Kong video release for THE BLIND WARRIOR (aka Neraka Perut Bumi) (which is actually a spinoff film from the series).

(click scan for bigger size)

Thanks to Miltos (of Cinehound).

INCIDENT on and off a mountain road (2005)

My second episode in the Masters of Horror series (but actually the first one that was aired) is Don Coscarelli's INCIDENT ON AND OFF A MOUNTAIN ROAD. A chick who's left her bossy boyfriend crashes her car on a deserted mountain road miles from anybody else. Well, anybody except some monster guy who's main purpose in life is to capture and have fun with girls who crash their car. ;o)
Coscarelli's episode is pretty good and very much in the same vein as films like WRONG TURN and THE HILLS HAVE EYES. There's a slightly different twist at the end though. :o)
It was nice to see a chick play the main character and she didn't even need help from some male stranger who just happened to pass by. Gee, wauw. The story line may exist within the confines of well known territory but I have no problem with that as long as the film is entertaining or/and well played (or has tons of gore, LOL). And INCIDENT is both entertaining and well played (there's some gore too). Oh, and Angus Scrimm aka The Tall Man from Coscarelli's PHANTASM films is in it too!

Here's the trailer:

CIGARETTE BURNS (2005)

I bought the entire first season of Masters of Horror on DVD the other day. I've only ever watched one episode of the series, that film was DARIO ARGENTO's JENIFER which I thought was pretty good and which was my friend Heine Sørensen's choice for the evening at a film night a few years back (men var det hos Henrik eller Nils? I forget). So, last night I watched my first episode and I deliberately chose John Carpenter's CIGARETTE BURNS due to the feeble fact that Uncut.dk's Caspar Vang gave it a good review three years ago, haha. I mean I'm aware that some of episodes are reportedly crap so I wanted to start off on a high note. So, how was it? I hear you cry out in wholesome unity. Well, Caspar gave it four stars out of five and I can certainly vouch for that! The plot: Some young guy who runs a cult movie cinema gets an offer from a weird film collector (played by Udo Kier) to find a particularly rare print of a film. The film itself is apparently so extreme that a riot broke out in the cinema where it was first shown and it has a rather negative effect on people. This is not a review so it's sufficient to say that CIGARETTE BURNS is quite good and certainly delivers in the splatter department. Udo Kier is always a welcome asset to any film regardless of the film if you ask me. There are a handful of references to real horror movies throughout. Recommended! Now watch the trailer!

The undoubtedly coolest music video on YouTube!!!

When the day comes and those crook Russian ex KGB scientists finally get that time-machine into production I'll be buying a one-way ticked to 1983! And I'll tune it so that every time we reach 1987 it'll automatically send me back to 1983!!!



In case you don't know: this is the best band every to grace this sorry-ass world; Melbourne's The Birthday Party (altho they relocated to Berlin).


NEW NOTICE:
The above post is a re-post. I was gonna post the Birthday Party video tonight (it's just past midnight where I am) because of today's occasion but then I noticed the date I posted the video the first time; It was on June the 3rd just after midnight and when I woke up in the morning everything had changed. It was a sad, sad day. It's been almost four months now and it's still a sad day. There hasn't been one single day when I didn't think of my mum. So why now again? Well, The Birthday Party is probably my favourite band of all bands so that alone is enough for a re-post but, also, I hope today is gonna be a better day than four months ago. And yes today has to do not least with their band name. Hint hint.
Anyway dear reader, have a nice October 1st.

Japanese splatter fun

Alright, it may be pop and shot on video but it looks like a fun splatter'y way to pass time. xD

THRILLER - cut, dubbed and subbed in Danish

Here's the über über rare Danish VHS release of THRILLER - A CRUEL PICTURE, or as it's known in Danish KAMPEN MOD MAFIAEN. And no obviously (sooo obviously) this tape isn't sitting on my shelf. If only. There's only one known copy and it's located in Sweden. LOL. I have the scan from a Swedish message board and I'm told the Danish tape is the cut and English dubbed version.

(Click scan for bigger size)

Thanks to Filminteressert of Uncut and Cinehound forums for making me aware of this scan.