Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Insanity comes in many shapes and forms

For fark's sake!!! >_<

I used to be able to follow and tape TV shows in the old video days. Before everything (telly show wise) began to come out in complete DVD box sets I would tape everything that I found interesting. Why? Well, cos I figured this psychotronic stuff would probably never be shown again, it would be lost! So I followed and taped stuff like THE X-FILES & MILENNIUM for years and years, and I had complete seasons taped off TV. For me, taping complete shows goes all the way back to the 80s when I remember taping complete runs of (the truly fabulous) WIDOWS and THE YOUNG ONES (on Betamax). And I had complete runs of THE SIMPSONS and SEINFELD (and my cousin taped ALL episodes of the original STAR TREK series from German tv in LP but then discovered that LP wasn't as good as SP so he then taped ALL episodes AGAIN when they were re-run, hahaha). However, some years ago it all became too much and I threw in the towel. Stopped completely. A couple of weeks back a Danish TV channel began running a French crime show called ENGRENAGES (released as Spiral in English) and I though the trailer looked really cool so I decided to start taping the show (alright, so I'm an old dude as I still say "tape" even tho it's via a dvd recorder now!). I knew the show would probably become available on dvd in France but with these things you can never be sure if the English speaking territories are gonna pick them up, and I need English or Scandinavian subs as my French basically consists of knowing how to say merde and sacre bleu (apparently the French don't even say the latter anymore, LOL). Also one other very important aspect is how GOOD the subtitles are! Unfortunately many subtitles on DVDs and video tapes released in the English speaking territories are terribly executed simply because in contradiction to places like Scandinavia these places haven't had a long tradition of making subtitles. They're simply not aware of the ins and outs of how to translate and put them on the screen. Sometimes you'll see retarded features like a translator repeating someone saying "I think, ehh, well, I think..." which is a normal way of speaking but it makes for terrible subtitles (and the written line should just be "I think..."). Also, I don't want subtitles from some clown who doesn't think subtitles shouldn't have punctuation marks! I want proper subtitles goddammit! So this was another reason I wanted the show off Danish tv as I knew the subs would be good. Well, episode #1 went well. The show was really good and a highly welcome to the American and British crime/cop shows. Episode two also went well (taping wise) but with number three I fucked it up. For fuck's bloody sake! As I said I used to tape shows on end and now I can't even keep focus enough to tape a series with a limited episode run! >_<
I set the recorder to tape but forgot to change the date as it started after midnight. >_<
I was so pissed off I went straight for Amazon to check if it were on DVD, found it, and ordered it right away! I guess I could wait for the re-run but you never know with Danish television, it could be another 6 months before we see a repeat, and I hate missing an episode. I haven't received the box yet but I hope the subs are good. I didn't see anyone complaining about them in the user sections but unfortunately there were quite a few people complaining about the subs on the Australian release of season 2! Season 2 and 3 are also out on DVD in the UK and I hope they've made their own translations and that they're good. Some people would rather watch films and tv shows in brilliant dvd picture quality altho the subs are crappy then watch propper subs via a tv rip. Well, I beg to differ: I'll choose the tv rip any day. :D

The only trailer that I could find for season one is dubbed into, eh, some eastern Euro lingo:

NB. The headline: Yes, I'm sure some would regard this as insane. Jebuz, calm down, it's just a tv show. Sure, but I want my proper subs, why can't I have my proper subs, arrrgh gimme my proper subs!
*foaming mouth, spastic convulsions, twitching, green puke on shirt*

Sunday, May 29, 2011

So you're happy with your *uncut* DVD release of BURIAL GROUND, eh?

LE NOTTI DEL TERRORE (Andrea Bianchi, Italy, 1981)
aka The Nights of Terror / Zombie - nattens terror / Zombie 3

Well, that's nice. I'm so happy for you. Keep living in your little fantasy world of fairies, goblins and imaginary superior dvd releases. Hahaha.

The scan here is the Japanese VHS (which Yours Truly won on eBay last night!) and it's the ONLY uncut version of the film! No, your new disc from AWE/Njuta Films isn't uncut either! The missing footage practically renders the film's story-line incomprehensible without it! Watching the uncut version is apparently like watching a completely different movie! So what's this most important missing footage you ask; Well, I'll tell ya what it is, it's a most important four second head crush scene, that's what!!! O_O

Why would they cut out a head crush scene from a gory zombie movie? I have no idea! Very weird indeed but the matter of the fact is that this scene is supposedly missing from all VHS and DVD versions except for the Japanese VHS. Obviously, I haven't watched each and every version myself (only the Danish and the Aussie DVDs) but I've asked BURIAL GROUND fanatic Joachim Andersson (we're talking Jim Jones cult level fanaticism here!) and other hardcore fans and they all confirm that the Japanese tape is the only truly uncut version. It's also mentioned on the IMDb (but of course that's not a guarantee of anything as the bloody IMDb is a piece of shit when it comes to reliable info in my opinion). Anyhoo, I'll be getting this awesome Japanese tape soon so that's just AB FAB. I'm sure you're green with envy, eh. xD

Nb: Altho the Japanese video title is "Zombie 3" the movie shouldn't be confused with Lucio Fulci/Bruno Mattei's ZOMBI 3.

More cool ex-rentals in the mail!

I received a truly awesome parcel from Member-X in Finland! Eight rare tapes that ironically all are Danish! xD.

BROTHERS IN BLOOD (Tonino Valerii). Very rare VHS, I'm only awere of one other copy (sitting on DEVAG Hans-Jørn/Diabolik's shelves).

LEATHERNECKS (Ignazio Dolce). Very rare ex-rental. Does Diabolik have one? I don't know but I'm sure nobody else does.

MOON OF THE WOLF (Daniel Petrie, starring David Janssen of "The Fugitive" fame). Very rare.

ABDUCTION (Joseph Zito). Do I need to repeat myself? Very rare ex-rental tape!

THE GUNFIGHTER AND THE KID (aka The Kid and the Gunfighter aka The Gunfighter). Very, very, very rare Danish release of this equally rare Filipino western! Nobody has this tape. Nobody. It's so rare if you look it up in the dictionary there's a picture of this tape in the difinition to "rare"!

Kathryn Bigelow's awesome film THE LOVELESS! I watched (and taped) this film the first time on tv in the UK in around 1990. I'm sure I still have my tape somewhere. I remember the tv version has some alternative camera angles but I've never actually made a comparison (nor read about this). When I moved back to Denmark in 1991 I found a copy of this tape in a rental store but couldn't buy it and spent the next 15 years looking for another copy! I finally found one at an outdoor fair 2 or 3 years back. Needless to say I've also got the new DVD but I hear it has some new music in it to get rid of the many "silent" moments!! It's a pity that people obviously can't watch a film anymore that doesn't have a pumping beat in all non-dialogue scenes (or at least that's what the producers obviously thought when they changed it). When I saw this copy at Member-X's auction I knew I had to place an offer, even just a small one. Imagine if this awesome tape wasn't sold and had to live a forgotten and unloved life on a seller's shelves in the barren world that is Finland. It would be like in the end of JEEPERS CREEPERS! I placed a bid for one dollar and won the tape. Good for me but sad that so few people are interested in a cool ex-rental release of this uber-cool film.

THE KNIGHTS OF GOD 1 & 2. This vertually unknown/forgotten British sci-fi tv-show is pretty difficult to find. Acording to Wiki it's only released on VHS in Denmark and Germany, and only the Danish release carries the original English audio whereas the German tape is dubbed. There is no UK release. And there's no DVD releases either. In other words quite rare. I've stumbled over part 1 a few times at indoor markets and outdoor fairs but this is the first time I've had a chance to get tape #2. The two volumes were sold together and since I already had a copy of #1 I've now got two of them so if anybody needs a copy let me know (I can chuck in a dvdr copy of #2 if needed).

Big thanks to Member-X for this trade!

Saturday, May 28, 2011

Can you feel my death/destruction/kill brain rays hitting you, Blogger???

In the words of Kelis: "Blogger I hate you so much right now"!!! >_<

All day yesterday, all night, and today I haven't been able to log into my blogs. I tried numerous times to log in, I changed my password from "bite me" to "smell this", and I scoured the Blooger help-page: Nothing helped!!! And all I found on the help-page was a quickly written note from four days ago saying they knew of the problem and were working on it. Since then nothing. Four days. Nothing. I finally find the answer on a blog by a coupla chicks... in MALAYSIA!!! Why oh why haven't Blogger been able to figure out this problem in four days!!! Arrgh. Apparently the problem is FIREFOX!! I switched to Explorer and could log in right away. Blogger, I hate you so much right now - and a big thank you goes out to the Malay chicks.

NB: the t-shirt girl is only here to ease up the angry atmos in this post. I feel like the dog in David Lynch's old cartoon "The Angriest Dog in the World"; approaching the state of rigor mortis out of anger and tension.

Friday, May 27, 2011

Black Devil Doll dvd

In addition to my last post I should include this one as well as I've just ordered BLACK DEVIL DOLL! Yay!! I posted about it quite a while ago, actually before it was even released, but it's been till now before I finally place the order. Too many damn films in this world I guess. LOL. Check the trailer, it's pretty cool. I think I called it a "remake" of BLACK DEVIL DOLL FROM HELL but I'm not so sure it's really a remake but more like a completely different story that just happens to deal with another black, horny devil doll. LMAO. And it's got heaps of gore and splatter too.

Around £12 via Amazon UK incl. postage.

Thursday, May 26, 2011

A coupla new saucers

Received my welfare cheque today. Not enough for this month's bills so I though "sod it, I'll order some DVDs!" If you're going down you might as well do it in style. So, anyway, I bought the RAMBO "Special Edition" DVD set (from Artisan) from 2002. Apparently, it's an awesome set with tons of extras. It's long out of print and in 2004 the same company released a new edition but they changed the title to RAMBO "Ultimate Edition" and threw most of the extras away. Go figure. My info is from an incisive post about the sets from a user on Amazon.com. The latest set from Lions Gate has got almost all the extras from both sets plus the fourth film so that set is awesome too, and yes I've got that one already but, hey, what can you do. I needed the old set too. xD. Oh, and if you are considering getting the blu-ray I hear it sucks! For some reason they once again chucked out the extras, or many of them anyway. Go figure (again)!!

HENRY: PORTRAIT OF A SERIAL KILLER. I've told this story about a zillion times but here it is again; I was living in London when I saw HENRY the first time. I think it was in 1989 or maybe '90. I went to watch it at an afternoon screening at the old (and sadly long gone) Scala Cinema Club. They used to have a double bill consisting of the same two films running all thru out the afternoon and on this particular day the programme was HENRY: PORTRAIT OF A SERIAL KILLER and THE STEPFATHER. HENRY was on first and needless to say I was overwhelmed. THE STEPFATHER was really good too but there just wasn't any comparison here and when the latter finished I just stayed in my seat and watched HENRY again (once you'd paid the entry fee you could stay all afternoon if you wanted). That night I DREAMT about HENRY: PORTRAIT OF A SERIAL KILLER. I've never done that before or after (at least not so vividly that I remembered when I woke up). After I moved back to this stinking hell-hole I began tape-trading right away and one of the first films I got hold of was a 3rd generation dupe of a film company copy of HENRY! It had a text line saying "Not for sale" or something similar. When I met my (later to be) co-editor on BANNED IN BRITAIN 'zine in around '92 or '93 she was very impressed that I had the film. It wasn't released ANYWHERE at the time. Now kids look at you with disbelief if you tell them there once was a time you couldn't get HENRY: PORTRAIT OF A SERIAL KILLER, haha. Anyway, I've already got a handful of VHS and DVD copies of the film but I needed this one as well. It's the 20th Anniversary edition from DarkSky and altho it doesn't say so on the cover (and altho Amazon wants me to believe otherwise) I'm pretty sure this is the 2-disc release. It's supposed to have thee best extras. Well, I certainly hope it does.

Roger Corman's 1950's sci-fi flicks CRAP MONSTERS, WAR OF THE SATELLITES, and NOT OF THIS EARTH in SHOUT! Factory's awesome DVD series of Corman classics!! Obviously I haven't watched the DVD yet but I'm sure it'll be gooood. SHOUT's prints are nothing short of BRILLIANT and they completely smoke the public domain and bootleg prints that shit companies usually think is good enough for these films. Too fucken bad - and a big fucken kudos to SHOUT for this series!

Lastly, here's MULBERRY STREET (cleverly retitled Zombie Virus on Mulberry Street by the British video label even tho I'm told there are no fucking zombies in the bloody movie, hahahaa). Thanks to Fred Anderson for the tip. Oh, and if you're in Denmark you might like to know I paid a *whooping* 22 kroner for the MULBERRY disc from Amazon UK including postage! That's about half of what a kebab is around here. xD

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

SHOUT! Factory's cover for their next FILIPINO TRIPLE is here!

FIRECRACKER (aka Naked Fist, 1981), TNT JACKSON (1974) and TOO HOT TO HANDLE (1977), all made in the Philippines. I'm looking forward to this release A LOT as FIRECRACKER and TNT JACKSON are highly entertaining and FIRECRACKER has never been released on DVD before (TNT has an awful public domain DVD which come out short when you compare it to my old Danish VHS!!). I've got them all on VHS but needless to say (with Shout Factory's rep. for using fabulous prints) this release is bound to smoke my old tapes!

FIRECRACKER is Cirio H. Santiago's remake of his own TNT JACKSON, and he even remade the damn film AGAIN in 1992 as ANGELFIST. It would have been fun if SHOUT! Factory had chosen to include all three versions and put TOO HOT TO HANDLE on another release (ANGELFIST, however, is available on fairly good DVD from New Horizons). Two more US-Filipino films are slated for release from SHOUT!: SAVAGE! (1973) and FLY ME (1973)

Monday, May 23, 2011

Beavis and Butt-head in Stewart's House

What a bummer this show isn't on DVD in its complete form. :/

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Los Demonios del Desierto (Mexico, 1990)

Dir: Luis Quintanilla Rico

Most of my Mexican cinematic intake has consisted of equal parts 1960's horror flicks like the DR SATAN movies, equal parts EL SANTO movies plus BCI's "South of the Border" DVD volumes! However, this is something quite different (to say the least!). Take a pinch of MAD MAX 2, add Roger Corman's 1970s biker movies, and move the setting to Mexico. Oh, and by the way, did I forget to say "...and ad Jim Jones' Mexican cousin too!", haha. That's exactly what LOS DEMONIOS DEL DESIERTO is!

Somewhere in the deserts of Mexico live an outlaw biker cult who, dressed like the worst Hollywood attempt at punk, follow an insane *diabolical* leader whose goal is to kill all ordinary people and make their sons his brainwashed followers. They kill travellers and steal their belongings. When the movie begins, they kidnap two beautiful young girls while they're getting ready for the one girl's wedding.

The two main characters are two cops (the girls' boyfriends) and when they learn about the girls abduction they grab their machine guns ("ordinary guns won't do") and set out to find and rescue the girls, and kill the cult members and their leader. Mayhem and violent insanity pursue.

After having killed a coupla goons you need a coupla beers!

LOS DEMONIOS DEL DESIERTO is great fun. I mean how could a movie about two elderly renegade cops (they're about twice as old as the girls who play their girlfriends!) who fight Jim Jones punk cult members not be a lotta fun!?!? And it certainly is!!! And it's pretty gory too. And the ending is, well, lemme just say I didn't quite see THAT *ONE* coming.

LOS DEMONIOS DEL DESIERTO is unfortunately not easy to find. I believe it's only ever been released on VHS in Mexico. The print I got hold of is an English subtitled (fan translated) version. The print looks pretty good. Find it if you can, wild entertainment guaranteed.

Suck my thigh before I kill ya!

Thanks to the friend who sent me The Demons and a handful of other cool & rare flicks!!

Friday, May 20, 2011

BRUKA QUEEN OF EVIL (HK/Philippines, 1975)


I wrote about BRUKA QUEEN OF EVIL here and posted the trailer. Andrew Leavold and I have been talking about this film for the past couple of years and now Andrew has finally got hold of a copy! It is with delirious and over-joyous delight that I re-post Andrew's review from his blog BAMBOO GODS AND BIONIC BOYS.
/Jack J

1975 – Bruka (Emperor Films International)

[Philippines release date 18th July 1975; a Hong Kong-Filipino co-production, export title “Bruka Queen Of Evil”]

Director Albert Yu Producer Jimmy L. Pascual [other sources credit Jimmy with Screenplay] Dialogue Yuen Shiao Po Cameraman Leung Kwok Kuen Music Chow Fu Liang Editor Lee Yam Hai In Charge of Production Fely Pascual Production Manager Vic Kwong Assistant Director David Yau Interpretor Teddy Chiu [as Tedmund Chiu] Special Effects Michael Fung Lights Chui Kwok Kuen Makeup Soledad Mauricio Wardrobe Romana Tablate Stills Wong Tit Huang Setting Maurio Carmona Props Ng Chau Electrician Tiburcio Pacia

Cast Alex Lung, Rosemarie Gil, Etang “Ditched”/Discher (Bruka), Sandra de Veyra, Yukio Someno, Anthony Lee, Michael Kwan, Charlie Davao, Connie Angeles, Darius Razon, Tintoy, Matimtiman Cruz, Roldan Rodrigo, Bruno Punzalan, Greg Lozano, Ramon D’Salva, Pedro Faustino, Alfonso Carvajal, Eileen Montinola, Ben Manalo, Michael de Mesa, Rocco Montalban, Kristina Kasten, Sancho Tesalona, Eddie Nicart, Jimmy Cruz, Gigi Vellasenor

Review by Andrew Leavold

Back in 1974, a Filipino producer named Jimmy L. Pascual ended his two year run of Hong Kong-based kung fu productions and brought his film outfit to the Philippines to make a film called Devil Woman. Essentially a chop sockey cashing in on the kung fu craze like Pascual’s previous films (The Bloody Fists [1972], The Awaken Punch [1973] amongst others), Devil Woman is a rudimentary revenge saga with fantastic elements and snake motif, a familiar ingredient in Asian horror. Despite the regulation atrocious dubbing and wooden dialogue, Rosemarie Gil is positively regal as the snake-haired queen seeking revenge on the townsfolk for burning her parents alive, and the film was a minor hit, even receiving a theatrical run in the US, and has retained a small fanatical cult following thanks to Quentin Tarantino’s regular screenings.

For years, fans of Devil Woman saw posters for a film called Bruka Queen Of Evil featuring Rosemarie Gil’s distinctive coiffure, and assumed it was one of Devil Woman’s numerous export titles. When a trailer finally appeared, the Devil Woman herself, Manda the Snakewoman, was indeed in the film – but with entirely different footage of bats, walking trees, and an army of little people. Was this the Filipino cut of Devil Woman for the local market merely redubbed and resold, or an entirely different film? Alas, no version of Bruka could be found, even amongst the most intrepid of Asian collectors.

Imagine my surprise, then, to discover a copy of Bruka Queen Of Evil last month in my post box. Ten minutes later, I can confirm Bruka is no Devil Woman. Although made by the same production team and with many of the original’s cast, its immediate sequel Bruka is an entirely different creature. A quantum improvement on Devil Woman, the film throws open Manda’s own personal narrative, giving her both a legacy and a destiny, and adds a new protagonist’s magical quest against a seemingly improbable array of oddities.

Bruka begins as Devil Woman ends, with Manda engulfed in flames as she falls over a cliff. Miraculously she survives, and wakes in a cave next to a white-haired hag and a cadre of dwarves. “I’m your grandmother,” the hag Bruka declares, and to prove the point, unfurls her fifteen-foot snake body. She then shows Manda flashbacks to her birth in a crystal ball, revealing Manda’s mother to have chosen a mortal husband over her reptilian heritage. Manda’s so happy at the family reunion, she literally dances for joy! Surrounding her is a brand new arsenal for her protection: bats, rock creatures, tree-men, and shape-shifting dwarves into snakes. Veteran contrabida Charlie Davao is the test case, a poor villager who sees a figure under a sheet in his yard. It turns out to be a wooden cross covered in reptiles who almost drown him in venom. And with that, the Devil Woman sequel has already shape-shifted itself to the next level of weirdness.

Grandma Bruka now gives her granddaughter a special gift – a black stone which turns her head full of angry snakes into human hair for as long as she keeps the stone in her mouth. To test the theory, she goes for a jungle stroll and kisses the first unfortunate hippie with a guitar who stumbles upon her. Spitting out the stone, the snakes pounce. Exssssscelent! In Bruka, Manda is no longed killing simply for revenge, and is instead awakening her true inner evil, and exploiting her outward normalcy to indulge her more primal, destructive instincts.

In Bruka, Manda faces a new antagonist in the shape of poor and angry Chinese Hong Pin (Pascual’s kung fu kicking regular Alex Lung). He takes on the job of finding rich Mr Tony’s daughter Louisa to buy food for his ailing family. In an eerily effective sequence he walks into a village obliterated by Manda’s snake scourge, bodies strewn everywhere covered in flies and bite marks, and he helps bury the bodies alongside a priest (Ramon D’Salva) and his hunchbacked assistant. The forest is full of peril, warns the hunchback, and Hong Pin must seek a hermit’s help. And as if on cue, Bruka’s dwarves burst into the church, dissolve into snakes and cover the priest and cripple. With the hermit’s rope-belt-turned-into-a-pole, Hong Pin makes his way through hostile territory, through all manner of creatures, to the cave containing Louisa and her virginal companions, all ready to be sacrificed to the Snake Queens’ insidious blood cult.

Pascual’s Philippines output for his Emperor Films International included another starring role for Lung, Dragons Never Die (1974), released in the US on a double bill with Devil Woman, and three Tagalog horror films released in 1975 alone for the local market (Isinumpa, Pagsapit Ng Dilim and Pandemonium: Lupa, Langit At Impiyerno). But if there was ever destined to be Filipino Lords Of The Rings with evil, fondling, Riverdancing hobbits and bleeding trees, this is the one film to rule them all. Those with a snake phobia, BEWARE; those with eyebrows ready to be raised and a keenly-honed appreciation of the absurd, enjoy, and I’ll see you at Ermita’s all-dwarf bar Hobbit House for after-movie rum cocktails.

Thursday, May 19, 2011


Fred Anderson of Ninja Dixon blog has just uploaded the trailer for his upcoming DVD release of THE KILLER ELEPHANTS (Thailand, 1976). Fred has recently launched a one-man company entitled ATTACKAFANT ENTERTAINMENT and besides THE KILLER ELEPHANTS Fred has also bought the rights for THUNDER OF GIGANTIC SERPENT (1988). These DVDs are not bootlegs or public domain crap but official DVDs. ATTACKFANT is based in Sweden and the two DVDs will carry English dubs. You'll find their Facebook page here.

And here's an old upload (from someone else) of THUNDER OF GIGANTIC SERPENT. Obviously, the uploader copied it off the IFD homepage and the picture quality ain't too happening but you'll get an impression of this crazy movie. The bad quality is of course not representative of how the new DVD is gonna look.

Firefist of Incredible Dragon - update

Korean poster

I wrote about the wild and crazy movie FIREFIST OF INCREDIBLE DRAGON the other day and here's a bit of new info from two nice gents; Knudsford of ASIAN CULT CINEMA SHOWCASE blog in Japan has provided highly interesting info on the film's origin and Peter "Kothar" from Cinehound has sent me cover scans for the French VHS and DVD releases.


Peter, along with my buddy David Z in the US, confirms that the French print is a good-looking letterboxed print and that it runs a whooping 11 minutes longer than the UK DVD!!!

Unfortunately, the French DVD isn't English friendly. :o(

Whether the French VHS and DVD contain the original uncut Korean print instead of the Tomas Tang version remains to be seen. One rather unfortunate piece of info I learnt via the British Board of Film Classification's (BBFC) homepage is that they cut out no less than 51 seconds of the UK DVD!!! As I wrote in my first post the film is also out on VHS in the US and I would assume that version is the uncut print (of the shorter Tomas Tang version).


Firstly, FIREFIST OF INCREDIBLE DRAGON isn't a Hong Kong movie at all as it says on the IMDb!

Whaaat? Surely you jest, Jack!?!? O_O
Incorrect info on the highly trustworthy IMDb??? Nooo!!! @_@

Obviously, I'm laughing my ass off here. xD
As soon as I saw that Tomas Tang moniker I suspected foul play but with info as difficult to come by in regards to an ultra obscure and rare movie like FIREFIST you sometimes got to run with what you're being given. Even shitty info provided by drunken IMDb monkeys.

However, here's the correct info which Tommy translated from Korean:

소림사 주천귀동 Juchon-Gwidong in Shaolin Temple (1982)
Chinese title: 少林寺酒天鬼童
Production Company Shin Han Art Films Co., Ltd
Producer Kim Gi-Yeong
Release Day 1982-06-19
Running Time 82 min.
Director Kim Jong-Seong
Cast: Lee Jae-Yeong, Im Poong, Han Hee, Joo Yong-Jong

I'm a bit curious as to the 82 minute running time info. Peter tells me the French tape runs 88 minutes!!! Did the Koreans have a censored print or is it simply a misprint?

None of these two French covers are particularly good I'm afraid! Actually they're terrible at conveying what kind of film is inside the box! You would think this is an ordinary - and kinda boring looking - martial arts movie. Well, like I said (i.e. rambled about frantically) in my first post this isn't an ordinary kung fu film by anybody's standards! I would loooove to see this being given a proper release by Mondo Macabro!! Are you listening Peter Tombs!!!

Big thank-you's fly out to Knudsford, Peter, and David!

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Best ever PRIMUS on a Wednesday

Anything good behind the stove?

Money wise I'm scraping the barrel now. No more tapes, no dvds, no nothing for the rest of the month. I'm stuck with tinned food and crumbs off the floor. Fortunately I've stacked up on coffee and old paperbacks. I intend to read the latter tho.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Oy vey!

The ridicule I've had to endure from Member-X thru out the past few years is more than any man should have to bear! >_<

Monday, May 16, 2011

HK chicks so bad ass they even spit - and speak foul language in Turkish (part two)

For part one go here.

The people at Customs finally sent me the tapes after I had to send them my invoice. I'm allowed to import goods into Denmark for a measly US$12 and these tapes were $10 each. I would have had to pay both the extra vat PLUS their fee (a whooping 30 dollars!!!). And all for some crappy Turkish tapes which I didn't even need in the first place! I just thought they would be fun to have because I'm a fan of those films. Well, FORTUNATELY the seller had sent me an invoice only for the ONE tape and he hadn't bothered to make a new one for both tapes but instead included the price for tape #2 IN THE POSTAGE FEE, hahahaha. Well, THAT WAS MY LUCK!!! This meant the invoice for the one tape was for $10 (and $21 for the postage!!!) and I got the tapes without problems. LMAO!!!

Oh, and when I opened the parcel I discovered one of the tapes was even a bloody Betamax tape, haha.

PS: And don't ask me why the Customs people didn't go: "Hang on, there's TWO farken tapes here! Where's the bloody payment for the second one!!" I have no idea. But then again they wrote they had a parcel that contained *DVDs*. o_O


There's one point in Anders Østergaard's documentary film TROLLKARLEN about the Swedish jazz musician Jan Johansson in which one of Johansson's friends talks about a dream he had after Jan died; In the dream he had just stepped out of a tube train in the Stockholm underground when he saw his friend at a distance, he followed him and when he finally caught up he asked: "Jan, where have you been? We thought you passed away" to which Jan coyly responded that he'd been away to help set up a music piece in Russia. Then the friend woke up and in the documentary movie you can see how his face changes when he continues "...but then everything was of course back to normal". It's weird how the mind works. A couple of nights ago I dreamt I was talking to some people and one of them turned to me and said: "She is dead" and pointed to a woman. I woke up and thought to myself: "That person didn't die, she doesn't even exist". Then I realised the person who made that comment to me was actually my mum who passed away in real life. We may get further away but it never really gets good.

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Firefist of Incredible Dragon - Korean poster

Big thanks to Tommy in Japan who sent me a scan of the Koran poster for FIREFIST OF INCREDIBLE DRAGON. Thanks, mate!

Saturday, May 14, 2011

Blow your mind for a penny!!!

Unless television has ruined your short term memory completely you'll remember I bought a DVD from Amazon UK for 1 pence a fortnight ago. I remember Fred "Ninjadixon" Anderson asked me if it were a good movie. I suspect he thought it would probably be the worst crap ever. I mean how can you get a good or even decent movie for one lousy stinking penny!?!? I must admit I kinda had the same worry, I mean, come on, ONE PENNY for crying out loud! Well, the movie is FIREFIST OF INCREDIBLE DRAGON (Hong Kong, 1983), I watched it last night and... let me try and put this into perspective... one of the wildest and most insane films I usually bring up when the debate is on, well, wild and insane movies, is WOLF DEVIL WOMAN. Most fans of worldweird cinema will tell you that film is a bat-shit crazy movie. Try and listen carefully to what I'm going to say now, I'll try and write it as slowly and carefully pronounced as I can... "FIREFIST" IS "WOLF DEVIL WOMAN"... AND THEN DOUBLE UP!!!!!! ARRRGGGHHHH!!!!!!

This is without a doubt the most wild, insane, crazy, fucked up, messed up, mindblowing piece of worldweird cinema I've eve seen!!! This film has EVERYTHING!!! Dead corpses, ghosts, flying ghosts, nudity, zombies, bad kung fu, a zombie doing bad kung fu, sleaze, gore, people pissing their pants, the window scene from SUSPERIA totally ripped off!!!, music from spaghetti westerns, bloody bath water, and tons more! The only thing you won't find is a flying head... BUT IT HAS A FLYING HEART THAT KILLS PEOPLE!!!!!

That one penny is the best penny I've ever spent!!! My good buddy Ingolf (who once was part of the Copenhagen gang but now resides in the fjells of Norway) tells me this version is even only a short version and there is a longer French print (only on VHS I think). Needless to say I tried to located that version immediately after finishing the mindblowing experience but alas to no avail. Apparently the French version is even letterboxed. The print states Jimmy Tseng is the director but I haven't been able to find any info on the film and I don't trust the fucken IMDb at all as most of that info is written by drunken Mongolian monkeys - on medication. The UK disc is serviceable but not great: fullscreen, English dub, and the picture looks like ass! (kinda like if it were taped off an outskirt TV signal). And there are scenes covered in a weird blue light, I couldn't even tell if it were MEANT to be that way or if the print just went from crappy to even more crappy - BUT IT DOESN'T MATTER!!! Somehow the rough picture made it all the more fun.

The DVD cover says 2002 but even so you can still easily get it from Amazon UK and eBay. My copy was a second hand copy but I bet it was only watched once (or not at all) as it looks like new. I checked eBay and it turns out the film was also released on VHS in the US but apparently it's never made it to DVD statesside. One seller stated the US tape runs 90 minutes which is quite a bit longer than the UK DVD but I have my doubts about that. I've seen one too many eBay page with info taken right off video cases because the sellers couldn't be arsed to check the tape or DVD (but if you have the tape please let me know. Cheers). If you can't play PAL DVDs I suggest you get the boot they're selling from FarEastFlix; their version is fullscreen + English dub but whether it's off the US VHS or the UK DVD I have no idea. I'm certainly gonna watch this again, I suggest you do the same if you're into worldweird films. xD

The deadly flying heart taking a rest in a tree.