What you expect - I'll never be (Stay Sick! dance party Vol. 1) - #1

STAY SICK! TURN BLUE!

Here's some crap (or crank) info you don't know about. Sometime in a long gone decade I put out a bootleg record as a soundtrack to my fanzine STAY SICK! (it was a freebee so record labels need not sue. Thanks). The platter was entitled "What you expect - I'll never be", a title both a ref to rockabilly and wild trash film culture - as well as the obvious response to, well, you know! The track list was all awesome stuff from before these times that we squad in that are truly awful pop-culture wise. Hey, I did not eat the cranberries from a dented can! Not much anyway. I'll try and post the ol'e tracks here in days to come (or not. In the words of my friend George Costanza "I'm an enigma" so who knows). Chronological orders are so square so let's kick off with number 10: KILLDOZER doing "Cranberries" from their EP "Burl" (which if I remember correctly they dedicated to a guy called Earl, and then years later they found out he hadn't died at all). I discovered Killdozer via an interview in Moshable fanzine in 1990 when I lived in Baron's Court in London and they were one of my fave bands for so many years. They run their own fb page here somewhere but don't update much. They took their name from a telly flick by the same name which isn't on dvd and that's a bloody shame as it's the coolest killer "car" movie. I mean, a film about a slooow moving demon possessed killer bulldozer, how could that not be cool. There are bootleg dvds out there.

For those who can read it, the original liner notes from the bootleg sleeve:
"Eet af mine favoritbands gennem alle tider. Nu desværre opløst. Totalt psykotiske sange, man skrandgriner bare hele vejen igennem!! Alle numrene er fra EP'en Earl." (det sku' ha' været "Burl")

James dishing it out in 1978

I'm told that crooked ex-KGB agents are working on a time machine somewhere in a secret bunker under the Gulag, and my man behind the old rusty iron curtain tells me it'll be ready soon. I can't wait for them to put it into production. I'm gonna get a five round ticket for 1978 and I'm gonna stay there for five years straight (every time we hit December you'll get thrown back to January) and I'll go to every gig by every NO-WAVE band that ever existed! And I'll get all the records (and buy extra copies and sell them at inflated prices when I get back here). This is JAMES CHANCE & THE CONTORTIONS with "Dish it out" from the fabulous "NO NEW YORK" LP. James is a Wildman so bug off!!!

Lost stock of ONAR FILM's "Turkish Death Wish" dvd found and for sale!!!

From the semi official ONAR FILM facebook page:

"CELLAT"... "THE EXECUTIONER"... LEGANDARY REMAKE OF LEGENDARY "DEATH WISH"... IT WAS ONE OF THE BEST REMAKES OF TURKISH CINE HISTORY... BLOODY, SHOCKING, BRUTAL... AND SOMETIMES IT WAS BETTER THAN THE ORIGINAL!

ONAR FILMS' CELLAT WAS OUT OF ORDER FOR LAST ONE YEAR. IT WAS TOTALLY OUT OF STOCK. BUT, WE FOUND SURPRISINGLY 60-65 NEW COPIES LABELED / NUMBERED BY ONAR IN A SMALL DVD SHOP.

NOW, WE START TO SELL THEM AS A GREAT SURPRISE... AND A GREATER SURPRISE: WITH THE SPECIAL SIGNED MINI POSTER OF TURKISH ACTION ACTOR MR. SERDAR GOKHAN (TURKISH ARCHITECT OF THE STORY IN THIS REMAKE).
DON'T MISS THIS GREAT OPPORTUNITY!
FOR ORDERS:
onarfilms.lastfilms@yahoo.com

Onar Film on facebook

Killer toone on a Monday

Don't you just love the moment when a serial killer gets into your car and sings along to "Always on my Mind"?

Needless to say I chose a version that has Karaoke lines in Chinese (next to being an Aussie Londoner by heart I'm also fake Hongkongese).

En Lejemorder Ser Tilbage and Psychotronic Broadcasting presents...

Another of my Dogme style YouTube videos on my Psychotronikc Broadcasting channel; Bad sound, bad filming, bad intro in bad German, and let's not talk about the info provided (i.e. lack of!). But at least the jokes are bad.

Best MATTEI OF THE DEAD ever!

One of my fave YouTubers is Pete aka Mondo Squallido and his channel Mattei of the Dead. He's just so fucking interesting! Pete is this super cool pommy guy who divides his time between the UK and Deutschland. This month he goes against the grain and instead of doing horror film reviews he's reviewing 31 documentary films! How awesome is that. Too fucken right it is!

I'm embedding his review of CORMAN, HOLLYWOOD'S WILD ANGEL here (I've got the vhs, it's not on dvd) and I urge you to check out more videos on his channel. If Pete were an icy pole I'd get a whole box right away from the ice cream parlour. And I say that in a strictly non homo erotic way.


PS: I realise the headline is confusing. It doesn't mean that this video is the best MATTEI OF THE DEAD video but that there are no other MATTEI OF THE DEADs out there as good as t-h-i-s MATTEI OF THE DEAD. lol

Knowing the difference

This song and this video by EELS are just wonderful. It also strikes home with this writer. Oh well. You just gotta make the most of it.

Winner of "Best YouTube Channel Ever" prize!!!

I'm so happy! YouTube has decided that my channel PSYCHOTRONIC BROADCASTING is thee best channel in the history of YouTube! Wauw! Wauw!! Wauw!!! Sure, it's in the alternative universe of Bizarro World but, hey, you gotta take what you can get, right!

I've been running this shitty channel since over summer and I've got something like 20-25 videos (couldn't be arsed to count 'em). Check it out. Sorry about the sound, filming, camera angle, noise, rambling dialogue, whatever. It's done that way on purpose cos I FOLLOW DOGME FILM RULES!!! (and in the words of Richard Kuklinski, if you believe that I have a couple of bridges to sell you).


PS: non English speakers may not realise this but the headline is a play on words; Piles (plural) is another word for haemorrhoids.

The Mind is a Many Splendoured Thing

I had stayed up till the early dawn. And I had asked the little man who lives in my alarm clock to wake me at 2pm but I woke before that. My house is haunted and ghost banging on the walls usually mess up my sleeping. An hour before the alarm clock were to go off I was half asleep with a mind that drifted between a late night convo and images of distant lands. Then out of a sudden, as when your computer program crashes in a split second and your wallpaper is thrown in your face, I get this vivid image from a location I don't recognise. Thinking about it, it may have looked like a table at a travel office. My dad is sitting in front of me. He doesn't look at me but past me. His face is worried and it is thin. Not quite as thin as what it later became but thinner than those old Kodak memories that float in my mind. It's like getting a bucket of cold water splashed into your face. I was wide awake in a split second but right away tried to go back to that unknown desk in that unknown room in that unknown location. I got back but the picture was now frozen. I've got a slight headache now and it is a grey and cool day outside. It has almost got the feel of a 1970s' day. The mind is an odd creature that messes with you in surprising ways that you don't expect. It's annoying and I find it fitting that I end this by quoting my friend H.J. Simpson, "Brain, I thought we had an agreement; I leave you along if you leave me alone".

Here it is. The smoking gun. Evidence of a hard-boiled meeting. Once in a lifetime.

To any reader of hard-boiled crime fiction this is an amazing photograph. This is the only photographic evidence of the two masters of pulp fiction Dashiell Hammett and Raymond Changler ever having met. The fact that it's from a dinner party at Black Mask magazine in 1936 only makes it even more awesome.
- Chandler second from left at back, Hammett far right, back.


Everyone in the photo:
Back, L-R: Raymond J. Moffatt, Raymond Chandler, Herbert Stinson, Dwight Babcock, Eric Taylor, Dashiell Hammett.
Front, L-R: Arthur Barnes, John K. Butler, W.T. Ballard, Horace McCoy, Norbert Davis