Bruno Mattei's THE JAIL

Here's the trailer, finally! Bruno Mattei's THE JAIL: A WOMAN'S HELL!! So you thought CASABLANCA was the best film ever made, ay?? xD

When all other Italian film makers had stopped making zombie, cannibal, and WIP movies Mattei kept at it! A full decade after everyone else chucked in the towel he trodded on with one 80s style genre-movie after another! I admit it, his later movies may not have been the top of the crop but you gotta give him kudos for his complete disregard for all other film makers having given up on genre-movies. Cheers, Bruno!

PS: This trailer is not even on YouTube!

20 second grudge

Pretty good!

Thanks to Julia for posting this on her blog.

The Crazies remake

I went to a big indoor second hand market in Melbourne around... well, early 1990s anyway, and some guy was selling all his video tapes. I had a look and picked one; Romero's original THE CRAZIES (aka Code Name Trixie). I asked the guy why he was selling his cool tapes to which he replied that he and his brother had way too many tapes, they simply haaad to get rid of some of them. "We have a big bookshelf with tapes like that one at home " he said and pointed to a bookshelf that was about half the size of any of my bookshelves, haha. Oh well, I got THE CRAZIES and I still have that ol'e Aussie tape in perfect condition. I always liked the film, it's not Romero's best but I definitely like it more than what many other fans do. So is this remake gonna be a bastard from Hell? No idea but in contradiction to quite a few of my fellow posters on Dvdmaniacs I quite like the trailer. So should you. xD

The Bionic Boy + Cleopatra Wong DVDs (Starlite Video)

I re-watched Bobby A. Suarez's Filipino movie DYNAMITE JOHNSON: Bionic Boy part 2 on DVD last night. The film is out from from Starlite Video (aka Global Video) in South Africa which also put out the first BIONIC BOY film and the related THEY CALL HER CLEOPATRA WONG.

All three films are quite enjoyable and all are unfortunately quite difficult to get hold of. CLEOPATRA WONG plus yet another Suarez film, ONE-ARMED EXECUTIONER, are going to get a reg. 1 release (probably) at the end of the year so that's pretty good. Brilliant actually. But it still leaves the two BIONIC BOY films hanging somewhere in the void, unfortunately.

Anyway, what I really wanted to address is some complete nonsense which is mentioned in regards to all three films on the German film data base OFDb, where it says:

Bemerkungen:
Hier diente wohl ein VHS als Vorlage, dementsprechend dürftig sind Bild und Ton.

What they're basically saying is that all three DVDs were sourced from video tapes and that the picture and sound is crap! Well, it appears that whoever wrote the comments (someone calling himself "Zeiram") obviously couldn't distinguish between a less than perfect transfer from film print to DVD, and a worn video tape!! And that's exactly what this is; The three DVDs are so not sourced from VHS but from real film elements! I have no idea of whether they're from 35mm or from 16mm but all three films are presented in the fullscreen format which could indicate they're from 16mm (but don't run with that as solid proof as I really have no idea!!).

The reason the picture is less than perfect in parts (only in parts! Most of the films look fine!!) is that these DVDs weren't released by some big-ass company who had enough money for proper transfers and restoration. Starlite Video is actually just one guy who's sitting on a bunch of rare film prints which he inherited years ago from a family member who owned an old cinema.


In my opinion the prints are alright. No, they're not perfect and if you need everything to be HD then I'd advise you stay clear of these DVDs. But if you're into worldweird films and excitement found outside of Blockbuster then I would suggest you pick up these releases when you find them. Or rather... "would have picked them up" as they're actually out of print and are already rare. According to the guy behind Starlite/Global they only sold around 300 copies each so there won't be a any reprints and the handful of other Filipino films he has in his possession and which were planned for release won't be released now. Boo-hoo. One of them was even COSA NOSTRA ASIA which has never been released anywhere to the home cinema market in English! :o(

First Vampire in China (1986)

aka FIRST VAMPIRE OF CHINA



I just won this poster on eBay. It wasn't that expensive and no you're right the poster isn't all that good either, HOWEVER it is for the extremely rare HK horror movie FIRST VAMPIRE IN CHINA from 1986. I have the movie on a fullscreen Japanese tape (Cantonese dialogue, Japanese subs). There's also a letterboxed and English subtitled laserdisc somewhere but it's very rare and I've never even seen it once. FIRST VAMPIRE IN CHINA isn't in the same style as the dark & nasty 1980s HK horror flicks I usually write about. This is more in the same vein as the MR VAMPIRE films, i.e. whacked out no-holds-barred craziness galore!!!



Here's a review Knetan (aka Kenneth Brorssan) posted on his Soo Good... review site:

Return Of The Demon director Wong Ying dabbles in vampire territory, with an amusing opening talking of indeed the first vampire in China. Threatening to take over the country along with his hordes of other vampires, luckily there was an earthquake to bury them all. Cut to the early 20th century and the new mayor Alexander Tso (Charlie Cho) arrives with his dopey assistant played by To Siu-Ming to inspect the town, the countryside and to generally wreak havoc with their greed and ignorance. Trying to extract what they think is a jade treasure (but is in fact the jade clothed first vampire), they blow up the burial site where other vampires are laid to rest and it's chaos from there. Master Kent (Sek Kin in the Lam Ching-Ying role) may be able up this mess. By no means a yet to be discovered classic, Wong Ying provides energetic pace throughout, with Charlie Cho and To Siu-Ming being cocks and literally being transformed into ones after being attacked by an re-animated one! Further energy comes via a scene where Shing Fui-On as a hopping vampire is caught in a skipping rope contraption while Hwang Jang-Lee turns up and threatens to marry off the daughter of Kent, in the afterlife. Also with Anthony Tang, Robert Mak, Chor Yuen and Sai Gwa-Paau.

VHS/Japan/fullscreen/in Cantonese/Japanese subs

And here's another (way cooler) poster I also just bought; MAGIC COP (1989) starring Mr. Vampire himself, Lam Ching-Ying (this on is easy to get on HK DVD).

Eternal Evil of Asia

I belive this is the only time every cought on film that a dickhead, i.e. an asshole, actually turns into... a dickhead. xD

When grown men weep like little Japanese school girls

Until yesterday I was certain of two things in life.

If I didn't know anything else at least I knew these two very important facts:

1) The wild Indonesian film 5 DEADLY ANGELS was released long ago on VHS in Holland.

And: 2) There was a rumour 5 DEADLY ANGELS might have had a VHS release in the US long ago.

Needless to say the Dutch tape is more rare than getting laid at a dike slumber party. I have never found a copy! Never! Ever! (but thanks to a nice Cinehound member I have a multo wonderfullo DVD-R copy!).

Yesterday, I found an eBay seller in jolly ol'e Canaduh who had a copy of the legendary American NTSC tape!!! And it came with a mint cover!!! And a "buy now" price!!!

Obviously, after having picked my shocked body up from the floor I clicked the "buy now" button right away. And then I waited for an invoice.

Today I got an eMail from the seller saying he... accidentally... dropped... a... hand-weight... on... the... tape...!!!

(insert shocked smiley here)

Let me just repeat that: the seller dropped a weight on the tape and it smashed!!!

I must admit I was kinda hoping his line would end with something like "but don't worry the hand-weight bounced off the tape and nothing happened. I just thought I'd tell you to better the relationships between our two almost identical countries" but, well, he didn't. :-(




I spent two years looking for this tape and then the only copy I've ever come across gets smashed by a fooking hand-weight!!!!!! Check the headline again for my state of mind.

Arrr, this is so truly, insanely, bizarrely, surreal'y, terrible I keep expecting a log lady to offer me some coffee. Haha. Oh well, C'est la vie as they say in some parts of Canada. If nothing else I asked the seller if I could get the cover and so at least I'll have that to look at while I cry into my cold coffee ("cold" cos I'll be too depressed to make a fresh pot).

Below is the cover scan (courtesy of Peter from Cinehound) from the Dutch VHS.

ANGEL 2 lobbies. xD

One of my ALL TIME FAVOURITE Hong Kong films is ANGEL 2 which I believe is also one of the very best in the Girls with guns genre. You could also call the genre Girls who kick ass and look cute (coined in an old issue of Asian Trash Cinema). But regardless of terminology... I just bought this uber spiffy lobby card set from Thailand! Arrr... (this is where you imagine yours truly doing a Homer Simpson drool, LOL).

I haven't actually bought any lobby cards before (except big Mexican ones but I'd say they're more like posters) but when I stumbled over this set I just knew I had to have it. And yes, it was... pricey. I really need to get myself a new job soon!!!



Anyway, I've written about the ANGEL series before in regards to my having bought the Japanese video versions. The films star Moon Lee, Yukari Oshima, Elaine Lui, and Alex Fong. There are three entries and #1 and 2 are awesome! No. 3 is more of a spy film and fails in the "shoot 'em up" dep. but is otherwise alright. The series became so uber popular that tons of films were released in Hong Kong in the years that followed, films that all had female heroes and had "Angel" in the title. If you're looking for someone to criticise this blatant ripoff mentality you'll have to look elsewhere as you won't find it here. I love all those films! Unfortunately, many of them are very difficult to find nowadays. A lot of them never came out on DVD and the old video tapes and VCDs are rare by now.

Btw, instead of ANGEL 3 you might wanna try and track down KILLER ANGELS instead as it's a much better film (and tons more violent!!). It also stars Moon Lee and is another fave in this house!!! For years I kept watching an unsubbed VCD from HK until I got hold of an English dubbed boot from the UK.



One of the films that fortunately WAS granted a release on a shiny li'l disc is the first ANGEL which (oddly enough) was released on HK DVD under its international title of Iron Angels. Fortunately, the disc doesn't contain the international, English dubbed version but the original Cantonese film. Unfortunately, ANGEL 2 and 3 are only out on crappy DVDs; #2 in Germany (dubbed and cut to shreds) and #3 on an OOP English dubbed, fullscreen DVD in the US.

The best way to watch ANGEL 2 is on VHS from the UK; MIA put it out on an English dubbed tape fully uncut and fully letterboxed! They also put out a fully lbx'ed tape in Cantonese with new English subs which would have been the ultimate release if it weren't for the fact that the bloody BBFC cut out 18 seconds of fun! Boo-hoo. My Japanese tape is also in Cantonese and fortunately fully uncut but sans the subs. You just can't win can you. :-(

Anyway, here's the trailer for ANGEL 2, do check it out!




[ANGEL aka Iron Angels/Angels/Midnight Angels/Midnite Angels/Fighting Madam/Ultra Force, VHS/Japan/letterbox/English dub/Japanese subs]

[ANGEL 2 aka Iron Angels 2/Angels 2/Ultra Force 2, VHS/Japan/letterbox/Cantonese audio/Japanese subs]

[ANGEL 3 aka Iron Angels 3/Iron Angel 3/Fighting Madam 3/Hong Kong Police Madam 3/Return of Iron Angels/Midnite Angels 3/Ultra Force 3, VHS/Japan/fullscreen/English dub]

What bloody sister!?

[click scan for bigger size]

I bought this film on a whim but I can't for the life of me figure out which film it is. Do any of you know?

The English cover title is BLOOD SISTER but I can't find a film that seems to fit the seller's description. There are several films called BLOOD SISTER and BLOOD SISTERS.

At first I thought something along the lines of the Taiwan films GOLDEN QUEEN'S COMMANDO, PINK FORCE COMMANDO or FANTASY MISSION FORCE but it doesn't seem to be any of those.

Seller's description:

This very rare - NO DVD release - 70s women of vengeance movie stars Chinese hottie Lin Ling who is oout for revenge after her boyfriend is gunned down by some syndicate. Lin Ling is joined by four hell bent for revenge girls (one in knee high cowhide boots!!) In the course of the action you get: female kung fu fighting, stick fighting, gun play, soft core sex, and lotsa bare bottoms and tops. At one point two women are gagged, bound and... you know. But they get revenge on their attackers - one knife into a bloody mess, the other groin stomped and left crippled on the floor.

Sorry, I can't think of a headline.

Someone over on Dvdmaniacs posted this enlightening clip from "CNN Denmark". I was born here but I had an Aussie gf for 10 yrs and spent a lot of time in OZ in the '90s so I kinda feel like 10% Aussie & 90% Danish and those 10% Aussie are cringing their toes right now. Oh man!!! Haha (and don't tell me, I realise it's a joke but still. As Homer Simpson would say it's funny because it's true).