So you're happy with your *uncut* DVD release of BURIAL GROUND, eh? (PART TWO)

Unless you have the brain capacity of a fruit bat (old Damon Foster joke from Oriental Cinema) I'm sure you remember my post about my recent purchase of the fully uncut Japanese VHS release of BURIAL GROUND (aka Zombie Nattens Terror / Nights of Terror / Zombie 3) - otherwise go here.

Half of the reason I did that post was to mock BURIAL GROUND fanatic Joachim "Jocke" Andersson in Sweden who lives and breathes that film. I mean how many times can a sane man watch that piece of trash! Haha. I'll admit it's a highly entertaining film but good? No. But then again, as you know, I enjoy Bruno Mattei's wrost pieces of garbage simply because they're entertaining.

I received the Japanese tape today and right away I had to make a video to post on Facebook to even further mock Joachim and the rest of his anti-VHS commie friends in Stockholm, Fred and Jason. The video turned out to be a masterpiece and you could be fooled into thinking it were an early effort directed by a young Richard Kern so obviously I'm gonna re-post it here. However, like I said it was meant to be posted on those gents' FB pages and that's why half of it is in badly conceived Swedish. My apologies to other Swedes. I didn't attempt to mock Sweden (as a matter of fact I love Sweden). I would have mocked Joachim no matter where he comes from, hahaha. Oh, and there was some debate on FB of whether I'm wearing pants in the video or not. I think I got most of them convinced I really am wearing pants.

Finally: the missing scene! Mein gott! It's like watching an entirely different film! My friends, this is how director Andrea Bianchi originally wanted his social comment to be seen. Not as that abomination which the producers re-cut to please the international distributors who just wanted mindless escapism. This is his rare uncut, unedited, untampered-with masterpiece that so few people have seen! This is his long lost director's cut that DVD labels around the world don't want you to see. I give you: the missing four seconds!

Twin?

The resemblance is uncanny!



From here. Thanks Fred (but why Fred was seeking out religious warning material is unbeknownst to me @_@ After all, he hates all that stuff. o_O

sick

I've had a fucken migraine fo r two days now and it's not getting better so I won't answer emails or pm or anything till this gets better which could take days. for fucks sake! and i was supposed to esoemne tomorwjlksfj fucken spelling! If your applying for the fanclub don't worry i've got people take care of that. later.

Insanity comes in many shapes and forms

For fark's sake!!! >_<

I used to be able to follow and tape TV shows in the old video days. Before everything (telly show wise) began to come out in complete DVD box sets I would tape everything that I found interesting. Why? Well, cos I figured this psychotronic stuff would probably never be shown again, it would be lost! So I followed and taped stuff like THE X-FILES & MILENNIUM for years and years, and I had complete seasons taped off TV. For me, taping complete shows goes all the way back to the 80s when I remember taping complete runs of (the truly fabulous) WIDOWS and THE YOUNG ONES (on Betamax). And I had complete runs of THE SIMPSONS and SEINFELD (and my cousin taped ALL episodes of the original STAR TREK series from German tv in LP but then discovered that LP wasn't as good as SP so he then taped ALL episodes AGAIN when they were re-run, hahaha). However, some years ago it all became too much and I threw in the towel. Stopped completely. A couple of weeks back a Danish TV channel began running a French crime show called ENGRENAGES (released as Spiral in English) and I though the trailer looked really cool so I decided to start taping the show (alright, so I'm an old dude as I still say "tape" even tho it's via a dvd recorder now!). I knew the show would probably become available on dvd in France but with these things you can never be sure if the English speaking territories are gonna pick them up, and I need English or Scandinavian subs as my French basically consists of knowing how to say merde and sacre bleu (apparently the French don't even say the latter anymore, LOL). Also one other very important aspect is how GOOD the subtitles are! Unfortunately many subtitles on DVDs and video tapes released in the English speaking territories are terribly executed simply because in contradiction to places like Scandinavia these places haven't had a long tradition of making subtitles. They're simply not aware of the ins and outs of how to translate and put them on the screen. Sometimes you'll see retarded features like a translator repeating someone saying "I think, ehh, well, I think..." which is a normal way of speaking but it makes for terrible subtitles (and the written line should just be "I think..."). Also, I don't want subtitles from some clown who doesn't think subtitles shouldn't have punctuation marks! I want proper subtitles goddammit! So this was another reason I wanted the show off Danish tv as I knew the subs would be good. Well, episode #1 went well. The show was really good and a highly welcome to the American and British crime/cop shows. Episode two also went well (taping wise) but with number three I fucked it up. For fuck's bloody sake! As I said I used to tape shows on end and now I can't even keep focus enough to tape a series with a limited episode run! >_<
I set the recorder to tape but forgot to change the date as it started after midnight. >_<
I was so pissed off I went straight for Amazon to check if it were on DVD, found it, and ordered it right away! I guess I could wait for the re-run but you never know with Danish television, it could be another 6 months before we see a repeat, and I hate missing an episode. I haven't received the box yet but I hope the subs are good. I didn't see anyone complaining about them in the user sections but unfortunately there were quite a few people complaining about the subs on the Australian release of season 2! Season 2 and 3 are also out on DVD in the UK and I hope they've made their own translations and that they're good. Some people would rather watch films and tv shows in brilliant dvd picture quality altho the subs are crappy then watch propper subs via a tv rip. Well, I beg to differ: I'll choose the tv rip any day. :D

The only trailer that I could find for season one is dubbed into, eh, some eastern Euro lingo:



NB. The headline: Yes, I'm sure some would regard this as insane. Jebuz, calm down, it's just a tv show. Sure, but I want my proper subs, why can't I have my proper subs, arrrgh gimme my proper subs!
*foaming mouth, spastic convulsions, twitching, green puke on shirt*

So you're happy with your *uncut* DVD release of BURIAL GROUND, eh?

LE NOTTI DEL TERRORE (Andrea Bianchi, Italy, 1981)
aka The Nights of Terror / Zombie - nattens terror / Zombie 3




Well, that's nice. I'm so happy for you. Keep living in your little fantasy world of fairies, goblins and imaginary superior dvd releases. Hahaha.

The scan here is the Japanese VHS (which Yours Truly won on eBay last night!) and it's the ONLY uncut version of the film! No, your new disc from AWE/Njuta Films isn't uncut either! The missing footage practically renders the film's story-line incomprehensible without it! Watching the uncut version is apparently like watching a completely different movie! So what's this most important missing footage you ask; Well, I'll tell ya what it is, it's a most important four second head crush scene, that's what!!! O_O

Why would they cut out a head crush scene from a gory zombie movie? I have no idea! Very weird indeed but the matter of the fact is that this scene is supposedly missing from all VHS and DVD versions except for the Japanese VHS. Obviously, I haven't watched each and every version myself (only the Danish and the Aussie DVDs) but I've asked BURIAL GROUND fanatic Joachim Andersson (we're talking Jim Jones cult level fanaticism here!) and other hardcore fans and they all confirm that the Japanese tape is the only truly uncut version. It's also mentioned on the IMDb (but of course that's not a guarantee of anything as the bloody IMDb is a piece of shit when it comes to reliable info in my opinion). Anyhoo, I'll be getting this awesome Japanese tape soon so that's just AB FAB. I'm sure you're green with envy, eh. xD

Nb: Altho the Japanese video title is "Zombie 3" the movie shouldn't be confused with Lucio Fulci/Bruno Mattei's ZOMBI 3.

More cool ex-rentals in the mail!

I received a truly awesome parcel from Member-X in Finland! Eight rare tapes that ironically all are Danish! xD.


BROTHERS IN BLOOD (Tonino Valerii). Very rare VHS, I'm only awere of one other copy (sitting on DEVAG Hans-Jørn/Diabolik's shelves).

LEATHERNECKS (Ignazio Dolce). Very rare ex-rental. Does Diabolik have one? I don't know but I'm sure nobody else does.


MOON OF THE WOLF (Daniel Petrie, starring David Janssen of "The Fugitive" fame). Very rare.

ABDUCTION (Joseph Zito). Do I need to repeat myself? Very rare ex-rental tape!

THE GUNFIGHTER AND THE KID (aka The Kid and the Gunfighter aka The Gunfighter). Very, very, very rare Danish release of this equally rare Filipino western! Nobody has this tape. Nobody. It's so rare if you look it up in the dictionary there's a picture of this tape in the difinition to "rare"!

Kathryn Bigelow's awesome film THE LOVELESS! I watched (and taped) this film the first time on tv in the UK in around 1990. I'm sure I still have my tape somewhere. I remember the tv version has some alternative camera angles but I've never actually made a comparison (nor read about this). When I moved back to Denmark in 1991 I found a copy of this tape in a rental store but couldn't buy it and spent the next 15 years looking for another copy! I finally found one at an outdoor fair 2 or 3 years back. Needless to say I've also got the new DVD but I hear it has some new music in it to get rid of the many "silent" moments!! It's a pity that people obviously can't watch a film anymore that doesn't have a pumping beat in all non-dialogue scenes (or at least that's what the producers obviously thought when they changed it). When I saw this copy at Member-X's auction I knew I had to place an offer, even just a small one. Imagine if this awesome tape wasn't sold and had to live a forgotten and unloved life on a seller's shelves in the barren world that is Finland. It would be like in the end of JEEPERS CREEPERS! I placed a bid for one dollar and won the tape. Good for me but sad that so few people are interested in a cool ex-rental release of this uber-cool film.

THE KNIGHTS OF GOD 1 & 2. This vertually unknown/forgotten British sci-fi tv-show is pretty difficult to find. Acording to Wiki it's only released on VHS in Denmark and Germany, and only the Danish release carries the original English audio whereas the German tape is dubbed. There is no UK release. And there's no DVD releases either. In other words quite rare. I've stumbled over part 1 a few times at indoor markets and outdoor fairs but this is the first time I've had a chance to get tape #2. The two volumes were sold together and since I already had a copy of #1 I've now got two of them so if anybody needs a copy let me know (I can chuck in a dvdr copy of #2 if needed).

Big thanks to Member-X for this trade!

Can you feel my death/destruction/kill brain rays hitting you, Blogger???

In the words of Kelis: "Blogger I hate you so much right now"!!! >_<

All day yesterday, all night, and today I haven't been able to log into my blogs. I tried numerous times to log in, I changed my password from "bite me" to "smell this", and I scoured the Blooger help-page: Nothing helped!!! And all I found on the help-page was a quickly written note from four days ago saying they knew of the problem and were working on it. Since then nothing. Four days. Nothing. I finally find the answer on a blog by a coupla chicks... in MALAYSIA!!! Why oh why haven't Blogger been able to figure out this problem in four days!!! Arrgh. Apparently the problem is FIREFOX!! I switched to Explorer and could log in right away. Blogger, I hate you so much right now - and a big thank you goes out to the Malay chicks.




NB: the t-shirt girl is only here to ease up the angry atmos in this post. I feel like the dog in David Lynch's old cartoon "The Angriest Dog in the World"; approaching the state of rigor mortis out of anger and tension.

Black Devil Doll dvd

In addition to my last post I should include this one as well as I've just ordered BLACK DEVIL DOLL! Yay!! I posted about it quite a while ago, actually before it was even released, but it's been till now before I finally place the order. Too many damn films in this world I guess. LOL. Check the trailer, it's pretty cool. I think I called it a "remake" of BLACK DEVIL DOLL FROM HELL but I'm not so sure it's really a remake but more like a completely different story that just happens to deal with another black, horny devil doll. LMAO. And it's got heaps of gore and splatter too.

Around £12 via Amazon UK incl. postage.

A coupla new saucers

Received my welfare cheque today. Not enough for this month's bills so I though "sod it, I'll order some DVDs!" If you're going down you might as well do it in style. So, anyway, I bought the RAMBO "Special Edition" DVD set (from Artisan) from 2002. Apparently, it's an awesome set with tons of extras. It's long out of print and in 2004 the same company released a new edition but they changed the title to RAMBO "Ultimate Edition" and threw most of the extras away. Go figure. My info is from an incisive post about the sets from a user on Amazon.com. The latest set from Lions Gate has got almost all the extras from both sets plus the fourth film so that set is awesome too, and yes I've got that one already but, hey, what can you do. I needed the old set too. xD. Oh, and if you are considering getting the blu-ray I hear it sucks! For some reason they once again chucked out the extras, or many of them anyway. Go figure (again)!!



HENRY: PORTRAIT OF A SERIAL KILLER. I've told this story about a zillion times but here it is again; I was living in London when I saw HENRY the first time. I think it was in 1989 or maybe '90. I went to watch it at an afternoon screening at the old (and sadly long gone) Scala Cinema Club. They used to have a double bill consisting of the same two films running all thru out the afternoon and on this particular day the programme was HENRY: PORTRAIT OF A SERIAL KILLER and THE STEPFATHER. HENRY was on first and needless to say I was overwhelmed. THE STEPFATHER was really good too but there just wasn't any comparison here and when the latter finished I just stayed in my seat and watched HENRY again (once you'd paid the entry fee you could stay all afternoon if you wanted). That night I DREAMT about HENRY: PORTRAIT OF A SERIAL KILLER. I've never done that before or after (at least not so vividly that I remembered when I woke up). After I moved back to this stinking hell-hole I began tape-trading right away and one of the first films I got hold of was a 3rd generation dupe of a film company copy of HENRY! It had a text line saying "Not for sale" or something similar. When I met my (later to be) co-editor on BANNED IN BRITAIN 'zine in around '92 or '93 she was very impressed that I had the film. It wasn't released ANYWHERE at the time. Now kids look at you with disbelief if you tell them there once was a time you couldn't get HENRY: PORTRAIT OF A SERIAL KILLER, haha. Anyway, I've already got a handful of VHS and DVD copies of the film but I needed this one as well. It's the 20th Anniversary edition from DarkSky and altho it doesn't say so on the cover (and altho Amazon wants me to believe otherwise) I'm pretty sure this is the 2-disc release. It's supposed to have thee best extras. Well, I certainly hope it does.



Roger Corman's 1950's sci-fi flicks CRAP MONSTERS, WAR OF THE SATELLITES, and NOT OF THIS EARTH in SHOUT! Factory's awesome DVD series of Corman classics!! Obviously I haven't watched the DVD yet but I'm sure it'll be gooood. SHOUT's prints are nothing short of BRILLIANT and they completely smoke the public domain and bootleg prints that shit companies usually think is good enough for these films. Too fucken bad - and a big fucken kudos to SHOUT for this series!



Lastly, here's MULBERRY STREET (cleverly retitled Zombie Virus on Mulberry Street by the British video label even tho I'm told there are no fucking zombies in the bloody movie, hahahaa). Thanks to Fred Anderson for the tip. Oh, and if you're in Denmark you might like to know I paid a *whooping* 22 kroner for the MULBERRY disc from Amazon UK including postage! That's about half of what a kebab is around here. xD

SHOUT! Factory's cover for their next FILIPINO TRIPLE is here!

FIRECRACKER (aka Naked Fist, 1981), TNT JACKSON (1974) and TOO HOT TO HANDLE (1977), all made in the Philippines. I'm looking forward to this release A LOT as FIRECRACKER and TNT JACKSON are highly entertaining and FIRECRACKER has never been released on DVD before (TNT has an awful public domain DVD which come out short when you compare it to my old Danish VHS!!). I've got them all on VHS but needless to say (with Shout Factory's rep. for using fabulous prints) this release is bound to smoke my old tapes!

FIRECRACKER is Cirio H. Santiago's remake of his own TNT JACKSON, and he even remade the damn film AGAIN in 1992 as ANGELFIST. It would have been fun if SHOUT! Factory had chosen to include all three versions and put TOO HOT TO HANDLE on another release (ANGELFIST, however, is available on fairly good DVD from New Horizons). Two more US-Filipino films are slated for release from SHOUT!: SAVAGE! (1973) and FLY ME (1973)